Once upon a time, in a land not too different from ours, there was a skeg named Jhambi. Jhambi was a common short arm who lived in a cave. Now, you might think that Jhambi was a good Skeg who obeyed his mom. However, he was very naughty. One day, after his mom told him to stay inside before he was eaten, he waited until her back was turned and ran into the outdoors while singing "Oh, I'm so happy, happy, happy, happy I am so."[a] He passed the savannah of his home, jungles, islands, and marshes before running into a Greater Short Arm. The Greater Short Arm said, "Oh, what's? Today's dinner, maybe?"
To which Jhambi replied, "No, you should eat someone sadder. I'm too happy to die."
The short arm said "Oh, really? You look pretty tasty."
Jhambi said "No, but they'll be less sad if they're eaten."
This confused the short arm, so much so that Jhambi ran past him without getting eaten. Now, you might think that Jhambi would have gone home at this point. However, Jhambi was very naughty, and he didn't want to return home just yet. So he kept running. He ran through deserts, forests, rivers, and bogs, singing "Oh, I'm so happy, happy, happy, happy I am so"[a] all the way until he encountered a Xirlio. The Xirlio said, "What? A tasty little skeg? Today must be my lucky day!" To which Jhambi said "No, you should eat someone slower than me. I'm too fast to die."
The Xirlio said "But you look so tasty! Why should I care if you get eaten?"
Jhambi said, "You'll only get so much energy from eating me, and surely trying to catch me will take too much to be worth it."
The Xirlio was confused, as he didn't know how food worked, and Jhambi ran past him without getting eaten. Now, you might think that Jhambi would go home at this point. However, Jhambi was very naughty, and he didn't want to return home just yet. So he kept running. He ran through beaches, rainforests, lakes, and swamps, singing "Oh, I'm so happy, happy, happy, happy I am so"[a] all the way until he encountered a Pit Skeg. The Pit Skeg said, "Oh, look, a punchable little guy! I think I'll rough him up a bit!" Jhambi, feeling clever after tricking his previous foes, replied, "No, you don't want to do that! I'm too smart to get beat up!"
The Pit Skeg said, "I don't care if you're smart, your face is very punchable."
Jhambi said, "But if you beat me up, I'll be dumbed down! You don't want that!"
The Pit Skeg was confused, so he resolved to end the situation by taking a swing at Jhambi. Jhambi got scared and ran away while singing "Oh, I'm so happy, happy, happy, happy I am so!"[b] He ran through swamps and lakes and rainforests and beaches and bogs and rivers and forests and deserts and marshes and islands and jungles and finally, reached his savannah that he called home. The Pit Skeg had long been gone, and Jhambi resolved to start listening to his mother so that he wouldn't be attacked by more vicious skegs ever again. He went inside, and his mother said, "Jhambi! Where have you been! I told you not to go outside! I was worried about you!"
Jhambi said "Yes, mom, I promise to never ever do that again."
And that was all for Jhambi, until, of course, he wanted to see those skegs and animals again.
[a] To the tune of the first 2 bars of "Mary had a little lamb" without the repetition of "Little Lamb"
[b] To the tune of beethoven sonata for piano number twenty nine, opus one hundred and six in b-flat major, "Hammerklavier," movement 4, largo (fugo) Or the other movements, I'm not picky. Except the third, I don't really like the third.
600 words exactly, don't complain about it being too short.